Huge Gay Weener

Now that I have your attention.

My poet friend Cori sent me an e-mail with HGW as its subject line, sharing with me some of the delightful yet unsolicited missives she gets in her inbox.

I don't know the context of the message, but the header (pardon the pun) alone raises (again, pardon) a few questions:

1) If you are a woman, like my friend Cori, what do you do with the e-mail? Do you want a Huge Gay Weener if you are a female?

2) If you want one, does it arrive by mail?

3) Are there storage and use instructions?

4) Are Huge Gay Weeners grown somewhere for harvest and shipping? Or are they removed in some horrible Faustian bargain involving broke, gay college students and scary surgical instruments?

5) How do we know the weeners are gay?

As you ponder those, please enjoy some spam e-mail poetry, featuring subject headers of e-mails that came in to my inbox today, along with Cori's message.

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It's nearly a haiku

Today's Word: Roots

From One Word

Where you came from, where you’ve been. An historical rear-view mirror. We all came from somewhere. We all have a tale. I tend not to think about my heritage, because I glance across to many wars, too much bad blood. A low tolerance for history as revenge.

P.S.

I know it's "wiener," you left-brained word fetishists.